Women Asking Men To Dance?

Should the Traditional Stigma be Dismissed?

In the past, it was considered taboo for a woman to ask a man to dance. But, should women today be able to take the initiative if they aren’t dancing as much as they’d like?

In earlier years of dance, it was common etiquette for the man to ask a lady to dance. If she was in attendance with someone else, men would also ask the woman’s date, partner, husband (or whomever she was with) if it was ok to take them out on the dance floor. It was also commonplace to “dress to the nine’s” when going out dancing, with men walking into clubs in pressed suits and ties, polished shoes and hair slicked back. Women also came gussied-up in dresses, hair perfected and jewels to match their newest shoes.

In more recent times, the dance scene looks a little different. Societal norms have changed and people go out to dance for different reasons today. A new wave of dancers may want a certain level of comfort when they’re out cuttin’ a rug, or their intent behind dancing may be for exercise.

It seems as though, women are not sitting around all night hoping to get asked – they are taking initiative and attaining their goals by their own fruition and appear to be FED UP with having to wait along the sidelines to get asked to dance.

In a recent article about the benefits of dancing, it was noted that doctors were prescribing patients to ballroom dancing. Most men would use the gym as their means of exercise, but women were using dance. This means that over time, women have been using dance for health benefits, rather than social.


On average, a dance social ranges between $5-$15, and a larger event can range from $20-$50. If the event has 1,000 people in attendance, you could easily rationalize that 700 attendees would be female. If women are paying $50 to go to a dance event, they expect to dance! Unfortunately, this is not always the outcome. The challenge therein lies that there are more follows (usually women), than there are leads (usually men). The uneven ratio in the dance scene has always been present, but it has now transitioned to, ‘men don’t ask me to dance’.

Here’s a solution, ladies – DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK! People are in dance for many reasons. Some guys could be shy and don’t know how to approach women (that could be why they’re trying dance in the first place). Some, may be intimidated. Some may not know you personally. Some, don’t know if you know how to dance a certain style. For you, dancing may be your “gym time”.

So ladies, if you’re waiting for a guy to ask you to dance because “it’s the proper way of doing things”, don’t hold your breath. Ladies outnumber the guys more times than not at social events. Try taking the initiative – you have dance goals to meet as well.


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